So I’ve been going back and forth for the last month or so about the grad school thing. The plan was to apply to this great program where I’d get two masters degrees: one from the London School of Economics and another from USC. Whether or not I would get in was never a question; I assumed that applying meant acceptance because I’m just that awesome.
The problem was in trying to figure out how I would get to London, pay tuition, support myself as a student in another country and then in 10 months turn around an come back to the states and basically start all over. The fact is that while the program would change my life and fits into my aspiration to one day be a college professor, I can’t really afford it.
Now sure I could take out a huge loan or try for a grant or two, but I want to get out of debt, not deeper into debt. So I decided that it was time to rethink this goal and whether or not this is the right time to pursue it. And I’ve come to the conclusion that the answer is a resounding no.
Right now is the time to focus on getting my freelance writing business going, paying down my debt and becoming more financially secure. I may have a job but I still live check to check and there is always at least one bill that goes unpaid every month. And that’s just not ok with me.
So my focus has shifted. Well, really, its become more clear. Its great to push yourself to the limit but I think I was trying to do too much. And truthfully, I feel much better having let go of one thing in order to focus on something that for me in far more important right now.
Have you ever had to let go of something you really wanted because the timing wasn’t right?
Congrats to you for going with the flow and recognizing that this might not be the right time for going to London. It shows that you are flexible when circumstances warrant it. That’s something a lot of people have not mastered, or they get an attitude if things don’t go exactly the way they want/expect them to.
When I was younger, I decided that I would go to law school after my children were grown and on their own. I knew I would be young enough to still be able to do it. Well, when my youngest was a junior in high school, I realized that I no longer had any desire to go to law school. Like you, I had no desire to go into a lot of debt! But working as a paralegal, I realized that I’m able to do work that I (at the time) still enjoyed but without the pressure and responsibility that an attorney has. I found a different path that will fulfill me so much more, and that’s where I’m headed now. Not easy when I still have my paralegal “day job” as I call it, but when you want something badly enough, you find a way to do it. Maybe not in the timeframe that you’d like, but it can still be done.
You totally rock and I’m enjoying getting to know you more and more all the time!
Hugs,
Lori
glad you’re sticking around=)