The last year or so has been a bummer romantically. Being newly single – after separating from my husband of 4 years, partner for 8 – the time came when I decided I was ready to go out and meet new people. For all of my trying, I never did recapture a real social life, or at least not in the way I thought I should. I’m still in my 20s so shouldn’t I be out having crazy fun every night? Bar hopping, clubbing and such?
Oh bah! To be honest, all of those things had lost their luster long ago when I was doing it before I was even legal drinking age. But the question remained, where does a girl meet a guy? Hell, isn’t there somewhere to go that doesn’t involve sitting in front of a computer, where I could meet new people?
Turns out that there is no simple answer. I hung out with my best friend at the local Irish pub, attended micro brew tappings, flew across the country for a Vinemeet, went to Seattle for one music festival and to San Francisco for another, and while it was all fun, there seemed to be no hope of a new love connection on the horizon for me.
And then one day I decided to take a risk and ask a guy I had been running in the same internet circle with for nearly three years, if we could connect outside of our public social networks. He was all for it and immediately we hit it off. We talked about everything and nothing; openly and honestly…intimately.
We spoke almost every night, so much so that over the next couple of weeks, he became the last person I spoke to before going to sleep…haunting my dreams. There was a familiar free falling, heart thumping feeling, but I kept trying to push it down until one day I finally admitted it to myself that I loved him…But how could I tell him? I mean, would it scare him? It scared me…
One night, I hinted around cryptically about feeling something I wasn’t ready to say yet and he knew exactly what I was talking about…
“What you’ve been thinking all day…is that you’re in love.”
Where does he get off being so cocky and knowing? Fucker…
But he was right. I was entirely smitten. Thinking about him all day, dreaming about him at night…Couldn’t get him out of my head. It took him a couple days to admit that he was feeling the same way, and then yesterday, I actually said the words, I love you.
And he loves me back!
Suffice it to say, I was floating on a euphoric love cloud for the rest of the day. I hope this feeling never goes away.